Immunity Now: It was five years ago tonight. One of the low-points of the Democracy: like the Gulf of Tonkin Resolution in 1964. Or the passage of the Alien And Sedition Acts in 1798. Or the declaration of war against Spain, in Cuba, in 1898. October 10th, 2002: Congress voted to give President Bush the authority to use military force against Iraq. On this October 10th, the same President is trying to claim authority that would allow him to spy on Americans without fear of retribution or oversight. Our fifth story on the Countdown: Mister Bush angrily threatened today that he will not sign the new eavesdropping bill for which he drools... if it does not also grant retroactive immunity to the telecommunications companies conducting the surveillance. So what exactly would those companies need protection from?
Bartlett's Quotations: Fred Thompson is the quote "biggest dud." Mike Huckabee's name is too hick-like. Mitt Romney is vulnerable on religion and will be attacked for flip-flopping. John McCain capable of winning a primary and losing the race. Not the ranting of some liberal... Rather the analysis of President Bush's former Director of Communications.
ODDBALL: The cheapest Borat knockoff you ever done seen. It's bad, and it's foul.
The Right vs. the 12-Year-Old: The instinct to care is hard-wired into us... especially the instinct to care about children -- it is why, biologists believe, the young of all species share physical qualities we describe as "cute." But instincts are not usually triggered by dry statistics. Statistics are never described as "cute." So when politicians want to reduce how much government does for children... they show us statistics, rather than children. Now the question: what do the same politicians do, when one of those children actually puts his own face to those statistics? As you're about to see in our third story tonight... they attack him, with a venom unfathomable to nearly all mentally-balanced humans.
Tabby Time: Once again it's time for Keeping Tabs, our nightly peek into the world of celebrity hijinks, entertainment, and repeated strangulated quotations from OK! Magazine.
WORST PERSON IN THE WORLD: Lou Dobbs, Billo and his Fox News network vie for tonight's top honor.
48: Keifer Sutherland has found a way to keep a real-life problem from interfering with his alter ego's vital work... of saving the fictional nation... and reinforcing paranoia in the real one. And in our number one story on the Countdown, would that all celebrities could deal with their own errors with such grace. As opposed to the barrel-scraping, beyond-the-D-list kind... who jostle on obscure award shows... and then cry foul. More on that presently. First, it's Jack Bauer...I mean, Keifer Sutherland...